Parenting
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226140858
2008-07-17T00:23:38Z
Gogo Dodo
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/* External links */ Trim links per [[WP:EL]]
{{otheruses|Parent (disambiguation)}}
{{Redirect|Parental care||Parental investment}}
{{Original research|date=October 2007}}
{{Cleanup|date=September 2006}}
'''Parenting''' is the process of raising and [[Education|educating]] a [[child]] from [[childbirth|birth]], or before, until [[adult]]hood.
In the case of humans, it is usually done by the [[Parent#Biological parents and parental testing|biological parents]] of the child in question <ref>{{Citation | last = Bernstein | first = Robert | title = Majority of Children Live With Two Biological Parents | date = [[2008-2-20]] | year = 2008 | url = http://www.census.gov/Press-Release/www/releases/archives/children/011507.html | accessdate = [[2008-3-31]]}}</ref>, although [[government]]s and [[society]] take a role as well. In many cases, [[orphaned]] or abandoned children receive parental care from non-parent blood relations. Others may be [[adoption|adopted]], raised by [[foster care]], or be placed in an [[orphanage]].
The goals of human parenting are debated. Usually, parental figures provide for a child's physical needs, protect them from harm, and impart in them [[skills]] and [[Value (personal and cultural)|cultural values]] until they reach legal adulthood, usually after [[adolescence]]. Among non-human species, parenting is usually less lengthy and complicated, though [[mammal]]s tend to nurture their young extensively. The degree of attention parents invest in their offspring is largely [[Proportionality (mathematics)#Inverse proportionality|inversely proportional]] to the number of offspring the average adult in the species produces.
==Parental duties==
There is general consensus around parents providing the basic necessities, with increasing interest in [[children's rights]] within the home environment.
===Providing physical security===
Providing physical security refers to a safety of a child's body, safety of a child's life.
*To provide physical [[safety]]: shelter, [[clothes]], [[food|nourishment]]
*To [[protect]] a child from dangers; physical care
*To care for a child's health
===Providing physical development===
Developing a child physically refers to providing a conditions to a [[health]]y [[growth]] of a child.
*To provide a child with the means to develop physically
*To [[train]] the body of a child, to introduce to [[sport]]
*To develop [[Habit (psychology)|habit]]s of health
*Physical [[game]]s
===Providing intellectual security===
Intellectual security refers to the [[condition]]s, in which a child's mind can develop. If the child's [[dignity]] is safe, that is nobody [[encroachment|encroaches]] upon a child physically or verbally, then he is able to learn.
*To provide an atmosphere of [[peace]] and [[justice]] in family, where no one's dignity is encroached upon.
*To provide "no-[[fear]]," "no-[[coercion|threat]], "no-[[verbal abuse]]" environment
*To spend bonding times and share wonderful moments with children
===Providing intellectual development===
Intellectual development means providing [[opportunity]] to a child to [[learn]] - to learn about [[law]]s of [[nature]] and [[moral]] laws.
*Reading, writing, calculating etc.
*[[Intellectual]] [[game]]s
*[[Social skills]] and [[etiquette]]
*[[Morality|Moral]] and [[spirituality|spiritual]] development
**[[Ethics]] and [[value systems]]
**[[Norm (sociology)|Norms]] and contributions to the child's [[belief]] and cultural [[convention (norm)|customs]]
===Providing emotional security===
To provide security to a child is to help protect and shield the child's fragile psyche. It is to provide a safe loving environment, give a child a sense of being [[love]]d, being needed, welcomed.
*To give a child a sense of being loved through:
**Emotional support, encouragement
**[[Attachment]], [[caressing]], [[hug]]ging, [[haptics|touch]], etc.
===Providing emotional development===
development refers to giving a child an opportunity to love other people, to care, to help.
*Developing in a child an ability to love through:
**Showing [[empathy]] and [[compassion]] to younger and older, weaker and sicker, etc.
**Caring for others, helping grandparents, etc.
===Other parental duties===
*Financial support: [[Money]] provided as [[child support]] by [[child custody|custodial or non-custodial parent(s)]], or the state
*[[Insurance]] coverage and payments for education
==Parenting models, tools, philosophies and practices==
===Conventional models of parenting===
*"Rules of traffic" models
It is an [[instruction]]al approach to upbringing. Parents explain to their children how to behave, assuming that they taught the [[rule]]s of [[behavior]] as they did the rules of [[traffic]]. What you try to teach a child doesn’t necessarily mean it’ll get through to them. For example, a teenager was told "a thousand times" that [[stealing]] was wrong yet the teen continued to do so. The problem of parenting, in this case, is not that they tried to teach him/her the right thing, but that they considered parenting as a single, narrow minded method of parenting, without fulfilling the range of parental duties.
*"Fine gardening" model
Parents believe that children have [[positive]] and [[negative]] qualities, the latter of which parents should "weed out" or "prune" into an appropriate shape. The problem in this parenting method is that parents fight with the [[fault]]s of their child rather than appreciate their current achievements and/or capabilities; a method which may continue through their whole life without [[success]].
<blockquote>
"The models “rules of traffic” and “fine gardening” are especially dangerous because we, following our best motives, constantly quarrel with our children, destroy relationships, and all our parental work becomes a hopeless effort. Moreover, we don’t understand why this has happened." [[Simon Soloveychik|S.Soloveychik]], <ref> http://www.parentingforeveryone.com/aboutbook Parenting For Everyone (Педагогика для всех, 2000, ISBN 5-8246-0042-2)</ref>
</blockquote>
*"Reward and punishment" model
"RaP" is a most popular model of parenting based on [[logic]]: for a good action - a [[reward]]/[[praise]] and for a bad action - a [[punishment]]/scolding/[[reprimand]]. To teach a child by this logic is relatively easy and can even be [[effect]]ive, especially if it is done [[consistency|consistently]]. It is because it forms a sense of justice in a child's mind that it works. But, simultaneously, it imparts the child's [[universe|universal]] image of the reward and punishment and when real [[life]] doesn't prove to be [[justice|just]] it undermines the child's [[faith]] in justice, according to S.Soloveychik. He writes "It is dangerous for the future of children. It may happen that a man, grown up by this model, facing the first serious failure or first trouble, would lift his arms and ask, “Why me?”
===Modern models of parenting===
Parenting typically utilizes tools of reward and punishment method, but most [[child development]] experts now agree that [[corporal punishment]] is not an effective [[behavior modification]] tool. In some [[jurisdictions]] corporal punishment (e.g., [[spanking]] or whipping) has been prohibited by law. Many parents have adopted non-physical approaches to [[child discipline]], for example [[Child time-out|time-out]]. The other "civilized" forms of discipline [[human behavior|behavioral]] [[Control (management)|control]], [[structure]], [[accountability]], [[Parental supervision]], etc.
*Examples of modern parenting models
===="[[Nurturant parent model]]"====
A family model where children are expected to explore their surroundings with protection from their parents.
===="[[Strict father model]]"====
Places a strong value on discipline as a means to survive and thrive in a harsh world.
===="[[Attachment parenting]]"====
Seeks to create strong emotional [[bond]]s, avoiding physical punishment and accomplishing discipline through [[interaction]]s recognizing a child's emotional needs all while focusing on [[holistic]] [[understanding]] of the child.
===="[[Taking Children Seriously]]"====
Sees both praise and punishment as [[manipulation|manipulative]] and [[harm]]ful to children and [[advocate]]s other methods to reach [[agreement]] with them.
===="[[Parenting For Everyone]]"====
The [[philosophy]] of Parenting For Everyone considers parenting from the [[ethics|ethical]] point of view. It analyses parenting [[Objective (goal)|goal]]s, [[condition]]s and [[mean]]s of childrearing. It offers to look at a child's internal world ([[emotions]], [[intelligence]] and [[spirit]]) and derive the [[source]]s of parenting [[success]] from there. The concept of heart implies the child's sense of being loved and their ability to love others. The concept of intelligence implies the child's [[morals]]. And the concept of spirit implies the child's desire to do good actions and avoid bad behavior, avoid encroaching upon anybody's dignity. The [[core]] concept of the philosophy of Parenting For Everyone is the concept of dignity, the child's sense of [[worth]]iness and justice.
====Christian parenting====
In the United States, [[disparate]] models explicitly termed "[[Christianity|Christian]] parenting" are popular among some parents who claim to apply [[Bible|biblical]] principles to parenting. Information on Christian parenting is found in publications, Christian parenting websites, and in seminars devoted to helping parents apply Christian principles to parenting. {{Fact|date=January 2008}}
While some Christian parenting models are strict and authoritarian, others are [[Gentle Christian Mothers|"grace-based"]] and share methods advocated in [[attachment parenting]] and [[positive parenting]] theories. Particularly influential on opposite sides have been [[James Dobson]] and his book ''Dare to Discipline'',<ref>Dare to Discipline. Bantam, 1982. ISBN 0-553-20346-0</ref> and [[William Sears (physician)|William Sears]] who has written several parenting books including ''The Complete Book of Christian Parenting & Child Care'' and ''The Discipline Book''.
In a study<ref>[http://www.christianitytoday.com/yc/2001/005/11.128.html Special Report: Christian Parenting 2001<!-- Bot generated title -->]</ref> of Christian parents done by ''Christian Parenting Today'' in 2000, 39% of the families surveyed have family devotions once a week or more, and 69% of parents consider Sunday school, youth and children's programs extremely important.
==Parenting issues across the child's lifespan==
===Planning and Pre-pregnancy===
[[Family planning]] decisions about whether and when to become parents, planning, preparing, gathering resources. [[Reproductive health]] and preconceptional care affect pregnancy, reproductive success and maternal and child health.
===Pregnancy and prenatal parenting===
During [[pregnancy]] the unborn child is affected by many decisions his or her parents make, particularly choices linked to their [[lifestyle]]. The health and diet decisions of the mother can have either a positive or negative impact on the child during [[pregnancy|prenatal parenting]].
Many people believe that parenting begins with birth, but the mother begins raising and nurturing a child well before birth.
Scientific evidence indicates that from the fifth month on, the unborn baby is able to hear sound, be aware of motion, and possibly exhibit [[short-term memory]]. Several studies (e.g. Kissilevsky et al., 2003) show evidence that the unborn baby can become familiar with his or her parents' voices. Other research indicates that by the seventh month, external [[schedule]] cues influence the unborn baby's sleep habits. Based on this evidence, parenting actually begins well before birth.
Depending on how many children the mother carries also determines the amount of care needed during prenatal and post-natal periods.
===Infants===
Infant Parenting is where many of the responsibilities of parents begin. They need to keep their infant fed with special food, adapt to the infant's erratic sleep cycle and comfort their child at all times. Additionally, they must comfort and love their child constantly and become very sensitive to anything that scares the infant or makes it sad. Mothers should breast feed their infants at this stage, and sufficient exposure to language will be important for the infant when it begins speaking later on.
===Toddlers===
When the infant becomes a toddler, (generally 1 year after birth) the parents must begin to provide basic training of different types. Of the skills the child learns at this stage, many of them are motor skills and coordination. The child must learn to crawl, sit up, and eventually walk. They must develop their hand-eye coordination from pre basic levels to higher levels of sophistication. Most speaking ability also develops at this stage, and parents must encourage lingual development by attempting to talk with the child, get them to understand basic gestures and emotional displays, and in most developed countries, eventually teach them to read and write. (This skill overlaps with the next stage of development.)
As the child develops and they learn to speak and move on their own, their curiosity takes sometimes "drives them like a motor." They will be able to crawl off staircases and swallow dangerous objects all on their own at this point, and parents will have to protect their child by protectng them, and in turn, showing them how some things (swallowing objects, falling off stairs) are dangerous.
===Preschoolers===
Parents are expected to make important decisions about [[preschool education]] and [[early childhood education]].
Parents have to love and care for their preschoolers doing all that they can to keep them safe. It is important not to keep things laying around that is dangerous to small children and items that say keep out of reach of children. Children at this age are very likely to put things in their mouths and eat and drink things that are dangerous to their health.
===Elementary and Middle School Years===
Parenting issues related to parenting school age children include [[Education]], [[Kindergarten]], [[Primary education]]. Parents must also gear them for the school years to come, which require emotional toughness.
===Adolescents===
During adolescence children are beginning to form their [[Identity (social science)|identity]] and are testing and developing the interpersonal and occupational roles that they will assume as adults. Although adolescents look to [[peer]]s and adults outside of the family for guidance and models for how to behave, parents remain influential in their development. Parents should make efforts to be aware of their adolescents activities, provide guidance, direction, and consultation. Adolescence can be a time of high [[risk]] for children, where newfound freedoms can result in decisions that drastically open up or close off life opportunities. Parental issues at this stage of parenting include dealing with "[[rebellious]]" [[teenager]]s, who didn't know freedom while they were smaller.
===Young Adults===
When grown-up children become adults their personalities show the [[result]] of successful or unsuccessful parenting. Especially it is noticeable when young adults make their independent life decisions about their [[education]], [[Wage labour|work]] and choosing mates for [[friendship]] or [[marriage]].
===Adults and Older Adults===
Parenting doesn't stop when children grow up and age. Parents always remain to be parents for old children. Their relationship continues developing if both parties want to keep it or improve. The parenting issues may include the relationship with [[grandchildren]] and [[children-in-law]].
==Parenting Styles==
:''Main Article: [[Parenting styles]]''
There are four universal parenting styles, each with different methods of parenting. Each parenting style has different levels of demand and responsiveness and the resulting child is different for each style.
==Assistance==
Parents may receive assistance from a variety of individuals and organizations. Employers may offer specific benefits or programs for parents. Many governments provide assistance to parents.
*[[Parental leave]]
Another source of Assistance is other parents. Using the advice of other parents is sometimes the best advice due to the fact that some have lived through exactly what you are experiencing.
==Advocacy==
Some organizations advocating more parental rights in the United States:
*[http://www.PaidFamilyLeave.org PaidFamilyLeave.org]
*[http://MomsRising.org Moms Rising]
*[http://www.fight4kids.com/ Fight 4 Kids]
==Parenting authorities==
*[[Benjamin Spock]], was an authority on parenting to a generation of North American parents.
*[[T. Berry Brazelton]], the founder of the Child Development Unit at Children's Hospital, [[Boston]], and Professor of [[Pediatrics]] Emeritus at [[Harvard Medical School]].
*[[Jesper Juul (family therapist)|Jesper Juul]] is a Danish family therapist and author and a renowned international authority on the family.
==See also==
*[[Affectional bond]]
*[[Child development]]
*[[Child discipline]]
*[[Empty nest syndrome]]
*[[List of child related articles]]
*[[Maternal bond]] and [[paternal bond]]
*[[motherhood_constellation|Motherhood Constellation]]
*[[Overparenting]]
*[[Parental alienation]]
*[[Parental leave]]
*[[Parenting and child guidance classes and authors]]
*[[Parenting practices]]
*[[Parenting styles]]
*[[Pedagogy]] (such as [[Montessori]]'s 'scientific pedagogy')
*[[Shared parenting]]
*[[Single parent]]
==Notes==
<references/>
==Further reading==
* {{cite book | author = Lerner, Brenda Wilmoth & K. Lee Lerner (eds) | title = Family in society : essential primary sources. | | publisher = Thomson Gale | year = 2006 | id = ISBN 1414403305 }}
*{{cite book | author = Juul, Jesper | title = Your Competent Child - Towards New Basic Values for the Family | | publisher = Farrar, Strauss & Giroux, N.Y | year = 2001 | id = ISBN 0374527903 }}
*{{cite book | author = Alvy, Kerby| title = The Positive Parent: Raising Heatlhy, Happy and Successful Children from Birth through Adolescence| | publisher = Teachers College Press, Columbia University | year = 2007 | id = http://www.positiveparent.info}}
==External links==
* [http://child-encyclopedia.com/en-ca/home.html Encyclopedia on Early Childhood Development]
* [http://www.effectiveparentingusa.org National Effective Parenting Initiative]
* [http://www.ciccparenting.org Center for The Improvement of Child Caring]
* [http://www.opo.org.uk/MAIN/Index.php One Plus One]
* [http://www.preventdelinquency.org Prevent Delinquency Project]
* [http://www.theadoptiveparent.com Resource network for adoptive parents and their children]
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[[Category:Parenting| ]]
[[Category:Childhood]]
[[cs:Rodičovství]]
[[da:Forælder]]
[[de:Erziehung]]
[[fr:Éducation familiale]]
[[he:הורות]]
[[ja:子育て]]
[[nn:barneoppseding]]
[[pl:Rodzice]]
[[ru:Родительская любовь]]
[[fi:Kasvatus]]
[[sv:Barnuppfostran]]